Now is the time to think of an excuse to decline free homegrown veggies [opinion]

Five or so years ago, when every Reading Eagle newsroom employee worked in the office, somebody would perform a magic trick at least a couple of times a month.

Most often it would be done by Ron Devlin. The veteran reporter would stop at a Philly Pretzel Factory store on his way to the office for his 2-10 p.m. shift.

All he would need to do was place the box on bookshelf next to the city desk, which is the nerve center of a newsroom, and invite a single person to help themselves to a warm soft pretzel.

Word would spread like a California wildfire. Within a few minutes, there would be an empty box, with coarse grains of salt and the lingering scent of baked leavened dough constituting the only evidence of the recent presence of pretzels.

It was as if he had waved a magic wand and made them disappear.

No such luck with vegetables this time of year, especially the kind that grow on a vine. The hot, humid weather has cucumber and tomato vines transforming into invasive species.

I’ve got more tomatoes than I know what to do with, and many more are ripening on the vines. And I didn’t plant a single tomato plant this year.

As the summer growing season begins to wind down, you’re likely to encounter a pile of cucumbers near the church entrance, sharing space with pamphlets for support groups and services, and/or at your workplace. A sign that reads “Free” or “Please take” isn’t necessary. Why else would someone place raw vegetables there?

I’m a cucumber lover, but I’m picky. I’ll pass on overgrown cukes with seeds the size of almonds, or the deformed gourds that failed to thrive due to lack of water.

Zucchini, like cucumbers, can get out of hand very quickly in the right conditions. Go a few days without checking the vine and you end up with a 2 1/2-foot-long, 6-inch-thick summer squash.

It doesn’t seem right to throw it away, the thinking goes. Maybe if I place it in the church, someone will take it.

After this week’s deluges related to Tropical Storm Debbie, I suspect gargantuan sweet corn may be in circulation.

Be suspicious of a co-worker who approaches you with a grocery bag full of thick, homegrown ears. It’ll be as tough as horse corn, the kind fed to cattle.

This is the time to think about an excuse. Something about how you’ve cut corn out of your diet will do.

If you ever see a giant zucchini while passing through a lobby, keep walking. It’ll end up on your kitchen counter for the rest of the summer.

Trust me.

Source: Berkshire mont